Reassessment

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As a tween, that’s what it’s called these days, I began to have in interest in traveling. A picture of the the Sphinx started it and Egypt was at the top of my list ever since. I was completely fascinated by Egyptian mythology, even named animals after Gods, Goddesses, demi-gods, and heroes.

My chance to go to Egypt on an educational trip years ago fell through. At that time, I gave up on going. I always felt that traveling was out of reach. Maybe something I could do when I retire.

Well, I just booked my flight to go to Egypt and I’m not retired.

Suddenly I became excited about going again. Months of planning with a friend didn’t diminish a constant nagging feeling of something was going to fall through again. Now it seems real.

While I am excited to go, I find that I’m more excited about seeing a dear friend and spending a week hanging out with her. Cairo simply feels like a bonus.

This makes me question my true desire to travel and all of the things listed on my travel board. Do I really want to see the world or is it about sharing treasures and time with others that makes it special? Perhaps it’s simply a little of both.

 

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Theatrics

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Concerts are the best thing ever for me. All of my life I have loved attending concerts of all genres. it doesn’t matter whether it’s a county fair and we’re sitting on the grass or an indoor stadium holding 30,000 screaming fans. Music speaks. The energy of the band combined with the energy of the crowd induces one hell of a good time.

In 2012, I was honored to attend a concert I thought would never take place in the United States. Two days ago, I attended another concert for the same band.

The show that this band produces is nothing like I had ever seen before. It’s a combination of story telling with visual play that is acting out in front of you. The vocals and music are in sync, no one is overbearing to the other. Even if you don’t know the language, you can feel the intent of the lyrics. Their use of pyrotechnics, lights, and industrial background is in perfect balance and has made this show the best one I had ever seen.

To most people that doesn’t mean anything but to those that know me, it says the world.

If you have the opportunity and want to see a great show, Rammstein is the way to go.

Reflections

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After in interesting and filling two weeks, I’m siting here typing this instead of going to work because I’m on forced leave for an injury. This morning, I signed for a credit card, now I feel as though I need to wash my mouth out. What a nasty set of words. This card, while not ideal was the best decision at the time, with 0% financing. Something important broke and is essential to fix.

Why is this important to me?

This is the end of a long couple weeks that lead up to me sucking it up, swallowing my pride, and signing the paper.

For all of my adult life, I have given everything to everyone. I made everyone’s wants and dreams happen with my time and money. That stopped.

I infuriated several people in my life with a simple phrase:

“Not my circus, not my monkeys” or “not my problem”

I forced everyone’s issues back on them. Yes, you read that correctly. No more push over.

No more chauffeuring, no more hand outs, no more nice guy.

My garage is being cleaned out right now of someone’s crap. My driveway is being cleared of another persons paperweights. I received a phone call from a locator service , passed on the information and told all of them to never contact me again.

This has lead to a very quiet morning to look at the events leading up to this.

I like to help. It’s simple. There is a line where helping someone turns into being taken advantage of. Not one single person that I have been helping came to my aid in the last couple weeks, not one. When handling my own things, life is damn good. Things happen and its no big deal.

Drama from the outside is poisoning.

It’s time for the vamps to go.

 

Daily Bits

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My girls are making it difficult to get anything done this morning. Every few seconds there is another vocalization in the form of a meep from one of them, one more than others.

Climate change has everything in an early awakening cycle. There will be at least one more temperature drop before Spring is here. The cats are shedding and the trees are blooming.

I have decided to forgo a garden this year in order to concentrate on remodeling the house. Since I’m doing this myself, it is taking longer than I planned. Life keeps getting in the way but that’s ok, I’m not going anywhere.

I’m listening to a podcast that is talking about fun money. This is a concept I have followed for many years. Simply divy up your paycheck into different categories. That way when you have the amount you need for a particular task, the money is there and you’re paying in cash, not with a credit card. This is how I purchased the LEGO Disney Castle in a previous post. My next venture is a PS4.

This podcast kinda feels like I’m doing it right. Not that I need validation but that this is the best way to do it and achieve goals at the same time.

Have a great Wednesday!

Change

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Change occurs everyday and at the same time it can seem as though there isn’t much change.

As humans, we like consistency. We like knowing how things will be. This line of thinking is at our own peril.

As a big self improvement person, one thing I have seen repeatedly is that preventing change crates more chaos than allowing it to occur.

Being home a lot recently due to the all dreaded winter bug, there has been quiet, peace, and time to think. Like I really need to be thinking more.

One goal in the new year was to simplify my life. For three months, I have spent significant time setting up an online shop that I just can’t seem to get it to work right. After looking at the time I’ve spent on this shop and deciding how much I really care about it, I chose to delete it and cross it off of my list of things to do.

This action made me feel lighter. I realized that while I thought it was a good idea, I was not dedicated to it and that time spent on it was preventing me from doing things that are more of a priority to me.

Sometimes in order to make change, we have to be honest with ourselves and the reason why we are pursuing certain things.

We have to evaluate what is the real importance to me and why am I really spending energy and time on it? Is the expenditure going to be outweighed by the gain?

The world has become a complicated and fast moving set of wheels that don’t stop.

There is a brake, we simply have to use it.

 

Happiness

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These days, my focus has been what makes me happy.

July 2016, LEGO Corporation announced the release of the Disney Castle.

For those that do not build LEGO, it is a rather large set which means a price tag that will prevent many from buying it. Don’t get me wrong, it’s well worth the money; on a fixed income it takes time to save the money up for it.

I was never a big fan of Disney. I liked and would purchase certain products: movies, stuffed animals, etc…

Last year, I had me first visit to Disneyland and I fell in love with the parks. I truly understood what the commotion was about.

I came to realize my grumpiness about visiting parks was related to how unhappy and stressed I was all of the time.

Being a grown up child has become my way of life.

Don’t misunderstand that. I punch a time clock, pay my bills, and all of the other adult things that need to be done. I simplified life so that when those tasks were done, the child is released to do the things I want to do, the things that increase my happiness tenfold like building LEGO, going to Disneyland, travel, movies, and what ever else I come up with.

The point is, my Disney Castle set arrived yesterday (on Valentine’s Day). I had been saving a little bit of money each paycheck for this set, used my VIP points to pay for part of it and found a way to get what I wanted without interrupting adult life.

The anticipation of watching the money grow, the surge of pleasure when I could finally order it, and the excitement when it arrived on my doorstep yesterday all made me as happy as a child bouncing around.

There is nothing wrong with that feeling. Don’t let society push it out of you.

Happiness is Disney

Happiness is LEGO

Happiness is a conscious choice

Happiness is being yourself

Happiness comes from within

Are you ready to be happy?

 

NaNoWritMo Begins!

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Today is the day!

We start writing what ever it is that we are going to write for this 50,000 word novel writing contest.

Have your ideas going?

I don’t. I looked at the note on my computer and few choice words inadvertently flew out of mouth.

So here’s the deal.

I set my plan up for 2000 words a day for 25 days.

Why do I do this?

Unforeseen events.

I have a paranoia with time and the lack thereof. I know, deep breath, there is always plenty of time. Even though I’ve come a long way with this, there’s a longer road ahead of me.

What to write?

Well…that’s a little more tricky. The truth is, what comes out is where I will go this time around!

Faith in the universe will prevail!

Too all of my fellow NaNoWritMo participants:

Happy writing and looking forward to a long list of submissions!

Gut Feelings

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I am one of those people that tends to ‘put off’ what my gut tells be to; that action has been to my own peril.

Not long ago, I realized this and made a conscious choice to listen to my instincts more.

Yesterday, I woke up with a nagging feeling to work in me garden. I was simply too tired to really do anything so I put it off, just watering the garden where I noticed the tops of two of my tomato plants were striped. Damn.

So this morning, with the same nagging feeling only intensified, I went out into the garden when the sun finally decided to appear. Low and behold. The culprit (I should say culprits) of my tomato plant destruction were caught in the act!

The Sphinx gordius, also known as a silk moth, had invaded my garden!

I collected ten of these bad boys off of the plants, ranging from 1 1/2 inches to 3 inches long. After checking each leaf, I am confident that I removed all of them and all of the eggs. But no matter how sure I am, I always have this left over feeling of ‘what if’.

The damage so far has been the top 40% of the 12 plants have been striped pretty good, most if it clean. I will have to wait and see 1. if I got all the damn things and 2. the plants will be able to rebound from the damage.

Have a great Tuesday!

Silly, Silly Me

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Silly me figured that since I wanted to take my writing seriously, I would listen to the experts that say to have an official website. After researching, I went with a hosting service that was highly recommended. Inexpensive, easy to use, and quick. Sounds great!

Three hours later, I’m cancelling the service and keeping my current author page. The first thing that got me was the cost. They show a low monthly fee then when you sign up, you are charged for multiple years of service at one shot. There is no monthly fee, it’s an upfront charge for the entire length of the contract, which is not disclosed. Yes, I read the terms of use and all of the other fine print. That’s also how I know I have three days for a full refund.

Then, I went to download a template for the site. That’s an additional fee. Anything I want to do tot he site, there is an additional fee. I came to realize that this simple little author page just turned into a serious financial undertaking.

Due to the backwards way of doing business I have seen lately, I will stay with the current services that I use. I will also have faith that readers can find a website with my name in it that is not solely just my name. They can also simply follow the link listed in there eBook.