Recently, I had the thought provoking experience of listening to a blog on toxic relationships and fear. This topic hits home with me after years of experience of being in such relationships. The hardest thing I have ever done was to let go of the rope that kept me tied to those people. Then, I didn’t see it as a problem they had but as a problem with me. Now I know better and recused myself from the darkness.
I wish I could say the recovery process was a quick one, not only emotionally but also mentally and physically. I still miss them and wonder how they are doing. In weak moments, the old feelings of sadness return but are less intense each time. Perhaps because I no longer look back through the relationship goggles but felt the true pain and worked through it. Maybe that is part of the healing process.
The worst part is bringing myself to be true to those that weren’t part of that section of my life. That’s when you realize how deep the wounds really are. We all want immediate satisfaction, immediate healing, immediate results. In some areas of life that is feasible, in others it is not.
I wish them the best and I truly hope they find a way out of the hole they are in. I know they are good people, that is what I saw in them. I know they could be happy if they wanted to and understood the situation they are in. As the proverb goes: You can lead a horse to water but you can’t make it drink. I am done leading, I hope one day they will take the chance and drink.
Have a great Wednesday!